Beastly

“She says they want to cover my body with dead people skin and skin from pigs while I wait for the Boston skin. I don’t want dead people on me.” Would anyone? What this kid has had to go through is more than just traumatic; it will scar him for life, literally. It reminds me on the memoir we read form Walker about beauty, the way she had a hideous scar on her eye from an accident and felt ashamed and unwelcome. She worried about her image, she wasn’t what she would consider pretty, and finally she doubted anyone would ever have a reason to love her. Brent is going through the same process having to watch his skinny rotten body on a hospital bed every morning. We’ve always know his characteristic way of being erotic and well kind of inappropriate, so it’s no surprise when his friend Alida comes to visit and all he can think about is if he’s going to get laid, “Were going to have dinner and watch a movie, but I don’t think we’re going to have sex because I don’t think I’m up for it” (61). This is how it starts, just a lame excuse that he’s not up for it, but sadly that is not the reason. He feels so ugly and beastly that he has sort of already accepted the fact he will stay forever alone, yet he has this feeling that just wants him to be loved again “It’s too bad that no one will ever want to have sex with me, but I don’t really care. I hope Craig can love me again” (40). How can anybody love him after an accident like that? This is not my thought it’s probably what’s going through Runyon’s mind everyday he lays there,” Mom, no one’s ever going to love me, are they?”(70).

 I think one of the hardest parts Brent had to go through were the visits from his friends and family. As soon as they saw him they were in shock, and I won’t mark them as greedy ungrateful people. Their just scared and a little disturbed because let’s face it it’s not a pretty sight to walk in to. All Brent can focus on is on their judgmental faces, “ He’s looking at me , down at my skinny legs all wrapped in bandages and then up to my stomach and chest, but he doesn’t look at my face”(56). Also I can’t imagine the pain he was reliving when his little cousin Amara came to visit him. He tried so hard to please her by painting his bandages and being all sweet and caring, but she won’t even make eye contact with him. She four years old and nobody expects anything from her, so she doesn’t have to play the role of the concerned cousin. He is freaked out and not afraid to show it.